Things Peyton Teaches Ella on the Drive Home

TUESDAY: The Toilet Song

Here's the brand-new song Peyton learned at school. (Thanks, recess friends!) And taught to Ella on the 15 minute car ride home. It's awesome in its my-kids-have-reached-THAT-age-ness:

Totally reminds me of the Parenthood diarrhea song. And don't you just love Peyton as a back-up dancer?

Just in case you're jealous that your child isn't as fluent in potty songs, here are the lyrics:

We will, we will...
Rock you!
Sock you!
Pick you up and drop you!
Flush you down the toilet!
I hope you enjoy it!

FRIDAY: The Pain of Childbirth

Ella: I want to be a baby again.

Peyton: You can! When you die and you go to heaven if you're really good in heaven then you can be born again and be a baby. But it's going to hurt because you have to have sharp scissors sticking out of your tummy.

Ella: Why?

Peyton: Because when you're in Mommy's tummy there's a tube so that you can eat. And when you come out of Mommy's tummy you have to have the scissors to cut the tube. And it's going to hurt!

Ella: Why?

Peyton: Because that's what happens when you are born. And you are going to whine and cry a lot!

Ella: How do you know?

Peyton: Because I have a scrapbook and it shows all about how I was born and the scissors.

Ella: I want to see it!

Peyton: Okay, when we get home I'll show you.

And when we got home he showed her the picture that has obviously scarred him for life:

Maybe I should clarify things a little for him, but, really, this is way more entertaining.

And these two car rides home are much, much better than what I usually get to listen to. You know, the standard screaming about how one kid gave the other one a mean face or is humming too loud or has the nerve to breathe.